Introduction
In the world of neuroscience and psychology, the concept of brain cultures, languages, and types is as crucial as traditional cultural differences. To highlight this importance, this blog post mirrors the content of an article on intercultural misunderstandings, replacing words with "brain cultures" and other BTG terminology. I did this to demonstrate how similar principles apply to understanding brain cultural differences in personal relationships and how crucially important it is that we understand and respect other "brain cultures." The original article, which inspired this adaptation, can be found on Preply's website, here.
Discover the four main causes of misunderstandings between different brain cultures and how to prevent them in personal relationships.
As living with diverse brain cultures becomes increasingly common, the risk of misunderstandings grows. The effects of these miscommunications range from mild annoyance to extreme frustration, both of which are unlikely to lead to a harmonious home environment or success in personal relationships.
Here, we explain what brain culture misunderstandings are and discuss their most common causes. Finally, we offer advice on strategies to prevent them so that your family can effectively navigate the diverse brain types.
Brain Culture Misunderstandings Explained
First, it is worth examining exactly what brain culture misunderstandings are. Family members naturally bring their own neural behaviors, expectations, and communication styles into the home. The misunderstandings that arise are interpersonal conflicts due to perceived or real differences between these neural traits.
A person’s brain culture is influenced by many factors, such as their cognitive processing style, emotional regulation, and communication preferences. Clearly, there is much scope here, resulting in a high likelihood that two differing brain cultures will collide and give rise to misunderstandings.
Conflict can arise through both verbal and nonverbal (e.g., body language, silences) miscommunication, generating negative emotions from both parties, such as annoyance, embarrassment, offense, uncertainty, and even anger.
Unfortunately, the potential for brain culture misunderstandings to occur is steadily increasing due to two contributory factors:
Increasing Diversity Within the Home: As society becomes more diverse, this diversity is often reflected in family units. Opposites attract, and different brain types gravitate to each other based on the qualities of the other that they lack. This pairing of opposite brain types creates more individuals with unique brain cultures. Nowadays, it is common for families to comprise people with several different brain types, who all must cooperate and live together to achieve shared goals.
Expanding Networks of Personal Relationships: Advances in technology have made it easier than ever to connect with friends, partners, and loved ones across different regions and cultures. This increased connectivity allows for a richer exchange of ideas and experiences but also brings together diverse brain cultures that can differ significantly. These interactions can lead to misunderstandings if the distinct ways in which different brains process information and emotions are not recognized and respected.
Causes of Brain Culture Misunderstandings
The causes of brain culture misunderstandings are often complex and multifaceted. However, four of the most common causes are described below, along with examples of each.
1. Neurocentrism
Neurocentrism is defined as “the attitude that one’s own neural processing style is superior to others.” Here, people view other brain cultures through the ‘lens’ of their own—i.e., judging them by the standards and norms of their brain type. In doing so, it is easy to misinterpret others’ actions and behaviors, leading to conflict.
For example, in brain cultures where direct and communication is valued, maintaining transparency between family members is viewed as positive and not insulting, carrying no implications of worth or value of the other. Therefore, it is not unusual in these brain cultures for partners to be very open with feedback.
But in other brain cultures where indirect communication is more common, direct feedback might be seen as confrontational, rude, and unnecessarily critical. So, in this type of culture, a partner who gives blunt feedback might see their style as being clear and honest without while the other might feel hurt, undervalued, and criticized by what they perceive as bluntness.
2. Different definitions of right and wrong
Another frequent cause of brain culture misunderstandings relates to the fact that what is considered right or wrong differs among brain types. Without a working knowledge of other people’s cognitive and emotional processing, family members make false assumptions about diverse loved ones.
For instance, approaches to timekeeping and efficiency vary between brain cultures. In some brain types, time is usually thought of as a very precious commodity, meaning that family activities are conducted as quickly as possible. But in other brain cultures, there is a more relaxed attitude toward timekeeping, with more emphasis placed on building relationships.
Other areas of potential conflict include attitudes toward:
A partner might value a strict schedule to ensure everything runs smoothly, while their spouse might prioritize flexibility and room for last minute changes. This can lead to conflicts where the partner feels their schedule is disrespected, and the other partner feels controlled.
Another area of potential conflict includes attitudes toward cleanliness and organization. One family member might see tidiness as crucial for mental clarity, while another might need to see their belongings visually to engage with their surroundings, leading to disagreements about household chores.
3. Communication differences
Different brain cultures communicate in very distinct ways. This includes differences in speech patterns, etiquette, and verbal and nonverbal communication. Consequently, these divergences can lead to confusion, mishaps, and disputes.
For example, in brain cultures where emotions are manually processed, indirect communication is prevalent, people use significant body language, facial expressions, and silence to convey meaning. Providing a wide array of messages being sent without speaking a word. However, in brain cultures where logic is typically manually processed, they tend to value direct communication, speaking openly and concisely is normal and valued, focusing more on actual words than nonverbal cues to garner meaning of the message.
In a family setting, this could mean that a person who prefers direct communication might miss the subtle hints from a family member who communicates indirectly. For example, a sigh or a certain look might go unnoticed, leading to misunderstandings about feelings and needs.
Additionally, different comfort levels with physical affection can cause misunderstandings. In some brain cultures, pursuing someone upset is seen that you care, while in others, pursuing someone while upset is violating their personal space and is incredibly offensive and invasive.
Another good example involves eye contact. Some brain cultures view eye contact as respectful, polite, and a window to the soul. Whereas other brain cultures view it as threatening, awkward, or challenging ones authority. Overall, there are many misunderstandings that can result from nonverbal communication.
Another communicative trait that is viewed differently across the brain cultures is interruptions. In many brain cultures, interrupting another person when they are speaking is considered to be rude, disrespectful, and stupid. However, in some brain cultures, for instance, it is perceived more positively as a means to join and actively participate in the conversation. It signifies interest, relatability and proof that you are connecting.
Even within the same brain type, etiquette can vary from brain culture to brain culture culture. For example, for a Hyper Flight, it is very common to avoid confrontation and focus on positive interactions, while a Hyper Fight may perceive the avoidance as a lack of respect and demand a resolution.
Finally, when two people are conversing and there is a difference in brain language competency or proficiency (e.g., one individual is a native speaker and the other is a beginner), this can easily cause miscommunication. It is very hard to properly engage in a conversation without having the prerequisite brain language skills—it is also quite easy to inadvertently say the wrong thing and cause offense.
4. Exclusive Brain Cultures
Exclusive brain cultures in the home can also cause conflict. As families become increasingly diverse, the home culture needs to adapt. This adaptation can manifest in many ways, such as providing information in various formats, ensuring accommodation for all family members, and not tolerating discrimination at any level of personal relationships.
For example, if an extended family originally had a majority of Hyper Processors dominating the activities and get togethers, and there are members who are Manual Processors, there needs to be accommodations to incorporate the manual processor into the family activities to the best of their ability. This may include providing a room they can gather in without loud rambunctious laughter without being ridiculed for leaving, respecting their ears when nearby by being considerate to the decibel, and avoiding ostracization. Without these adaptations, the family member might feel excluded and misunderstood.
Another example is respecting each family member’s need for alone time versus social interaction. Some might need quiet time to recharge, while others thrive on constant social engagement. Balancing these needs is essential to prevent feelings of isolation or overwhelm.
How to Prevent Brain Culture Misunderstandings
More education and greater awareness are essential for preventing brain culture misunderstandings. Recognizing that there is no single ‘right way’ to do something but rather many ways is crucial. Understanding how and where these misunderstandings might occur can help prevent them.
Implementing this mindset at home can be achieved in several ways:
Provide diversity training
These initiatives can increase family members’ awareness of neural differences, promoting a greater understanding and appreciation for diversity.
Consider setting up regular family meetings where each member can share their experiences and learn about different brain types. This can help create a supportive environment where everyone feels heard and valued.
Be Informed About Diverse Brain Types
Gaining an awareness and understanding of your loved ones’ specific brain types allows for steps to accommodate them and prevent conflict. This might involve reading about different cognitive and emotional processing styles and discussing these differences openly.
For example, a family might read books or watch documentaries about neurodiversity together and then discuss what they learned. This can lead to deeper insights into each other’s experiences and foster empathy.
Celebrate Brain Culture Differences
Rather than exclusively regarding brain cultural differences as causes for misunderstandings and friction, they should be celebrated in your home and seen as opportunities to grow and learn about new ways to approach various situations.
As a general rule, the overall strategy to prevent intercultural misunderstandings is being educated about different cultures, putting those ideas into practice, and continuing to learn through experience with diverse loved ones and friends. Although there are many potential pitfalls to avoid with regard to inter brain cultural conflicts, most people appreciate someone’s genuine effort to —respectfully—join in with their brain culture, behaviors, and brain language.
Develop a Neuroverse Mindset
A greater awareness of brain culture misunderstandings leads to a neuroverse mindset suited to today’s diverse personal relationships. This knowledge increases intercultural empathy, making it easier to integrate and work across multiple brain cultures. The end result is a harmonious and thriving home that builds mutually beneficial relationships.
If you’d like to know how we can help your family prevent brain culture misunderstandings with customized training for your loved ones, explore the programs we offer.
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